Today I wanted to address the hated job of proofing and editing. It usually brings a heavy sigh and rolled eyes. Why worry about it? Especially now that Word will find misspellings for you... Well, with a light-hearted reproach, I’ve found a few reasons why you should worry about it. These are from a collection of actual Church bulletin blunders.
1. Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.
2. Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
3. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
4. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
5. The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.
6. This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
7. Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor.
8. Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.
9. This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
10. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.
11. A bean supper well be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
12. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
13. The Reverend Merriweather spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.
14. The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7:00 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
15. During the absence of our pastor we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Scubbs supplied our pulpit.
16. The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
17. Weight Watchers will meet at 7:00 pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.
18. Next Sunday, Mrs. Vinson will be the soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."
19. The choir will meet at the Larsen home for fun and sinning.
20. A song fest was hell at the Methodist Church Wednesday.
21. The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."
22. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in school days.
23. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say, "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.
24. The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.
25. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
Happy proofing!
1. Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.
2. Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
3. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
4. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
5. The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.
6. This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
7. Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor.
8. Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.
9. This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
10. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.
11. A bean supper well be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
12. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
13. The Reverend Merriweather spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.
14. The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7:00 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
15. During the absence of our pastor we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Scubbs supplied our pulpit.
16. The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
17. Weight Watchers will meet at 7:00 pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.
18. Next Sunday, Mrs. Vinson will be the soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."
19. The choir will meet at the Larsen home for fun and sinning.
20. A song fest was hell at the Methodist Church Wednesday.
21. The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."
22. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in school days.
23. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say, "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.
24. The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.
25. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
Happy proofing!
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